The Maximoffs Watch Game of Thrones
by riot3672
Summary: During a marathoning of Game of Thrones, Tony makes some rather facile comparisons between Jaime and Cersei Lannister and the Maximoff twins. Pietro plays it off as best he can, but when the Avengers' next mission is to infiltrate a Hydra base in an abandoned castle, Pietro may just have to convince Wanda to try something...


**A/N:** Okay, I wrote this yesterday, so it may not be super top quality, but here we go. Someone sometime ago made a post about the Avengers watching _Game of Thrones_ , and I had to give it a try. We've got some consenting incest here, so if that's not your thing, you either want to stop about halfway through or not read it in general. Also, yes, this story has spoilers for season one (and I think two) for _Game of Thrones_.

Also, if anyone picks up the bits of _Wolverine and the X-Men_ Pietro I threw in there, get yourself a cookie.

Hope you enjoy.

* * *

There was nothing that brought out the emotions of the Avengers like marathoning Game of Thrones. It was one of those events that even Stark would show up for, if nothing else, to watch everyone make fun of Steve. Every time they watched an episode, Steve would whine about the gratuitous violence and sex, like the show brought out a super 1940s conservative version of the man.

That day, they were marathoning back through the first season for Stark, who apparently hadn't been paying attention to anything and insisted that because it was his HBO subscription, they go back for him. Pietro didn't mind—he missed a lot of the characters from the earlier seasons. Or, rather, he missed the opportunities he used to have to compare everyone who'd take the bait to Joffrey and Khaleesi's hilariously idiotic brother.

"So Pietro, what do you think? Full army for Wanda to marry a warlord?" Clint joked.

Pietro pulled Wanda a little closer, who'd been cuddled into him on the floor. "Selling Daenerys was Viserys' pitfall. You can see it in his eyes—he regretted the decision, and it leads to that built up rage and impatience that kills him."

"How does Pietro know that?" Vision asked. "Do they say it?"

"He's reading facial expressions," Nat replied. "And extrapolating."

Thor spoke up. "In this world, is love between siblings accepted or not? I agree with Quicksilver's analysis. The brother clearly lusts for his sister."

"Come on, Thor," Clint said. "The Targs' entire existence is built on incest, so they're cool, but otherwise no way."

"Sabrina the Teenage Witch, can you read their minds?" Stark asked.

"No, why would I be able to do that?" Wanda replied.

"Don't respond to Sabrina the Teenage Witch. It's demeaning," Pietro chided his sister.

"Who knows, Wanda?" Vision said. "You seem to be discovering new powers every day. Maybe you could warp reality."

Wanda smiled at Vision. "Maybe."

Pietro took her hand and focused back on the screen.

A scene with Tyrion came on. "Hey Stark?" Pietro said.

"What?"

"In the alternate dimension Wanda's going to open with Master Vision's guidance, you'd be Tyrion."

Stark smirked. "Keep raining the compliments, Petey."

"Because he's a womanizer?" Steve asked.

"Because I'm a genius?" Stark suggested.

"Because you're short," Pietro said.

"And what about the rest of us, Pietro?" Wanda teased.

"Easy. Nat would be Arya, Clint would be Littlefinger, Thor would be Khal Drogo, Vision would be Jon Snow, Wanda would be Daenerys, I'd be Bronn, and Steve would be Ned Stark." He paused. "No, I lied. Clint would be Bran."

"Why'd you change it to Bran?" Clint asked.

"Because you're useless."

Stark nudged Steve. "You die being so righteous that you're stupid." Steve only scowled more than he'd already been watching the latest pair of tits make their appearance. "Also, Petrie, I think you missed the biggest opportunity with you and Wander. Jaime and Cersei Lannister. Cersei's a bitch, which is like a witch, and working against the oppression of the patriarchy like your sister, and loves her family. Jaime has light hair like you, can fight well, thinks he can fight better than he can, and totally and completely wants that sister-v."

It was one of those moments where Cersei and Jaime were getting it on doggy style in an abandoned castle, and he and Wanda were practically spooning.

"I concur with that analysis," Clint said.

"You guys are disgusting, and this show is disgusting," Steve huffed.

Pietro didn't look to Wanda, just went for it. "Actually, here's the thing about Cersei and Jaime. They're not doing it right. See, if I had a twin," he got some weird looks, "and got to bang her in a castle, I wouldn't be doing it doggy style. No way. I'd want to look into my sister's eyes, know there's a connection between us as we take in the magnificent setting. In fact, I'd want to be on the bottom, so when I look up, I can see both my sister and the artistry of the castle. Clearly, Jaime and Cersei were into the view, but you can never know if the other is enjoying that view."

Absolutely everyone looked to Pietro, expressions ranging from Wanda's horror to Vision's confusion to everyone else's pure shock. Steve actually left the room. Pietro just smirked and watched as Bran fell out of the tower. Pietro - 2, Stark - 0.

* * *

The latest Avengers mission was pretty standard—grab some information or other from a Hydra base in Scotland. The idiots made camp inside one of those abandoned castles, as if it wasn't completely conspicuous. Whatever; it wasn't his problem to care about how stupid Hydra was anymore.

"Pietro, I'm going to need you to go in first and manually input the security code for the basement," Steve—no, Captain America, said as they all prepared to jump out of their ride.

"Stark can't hack that?" Pietro asked.

"No."

Pietro shrugged. "Whatever you want, Cap."

"Wanda, I'll need you to go with Clint and Nat—"

"No!" Pietro and Wanda said.

Captain America's expression actually hardened this time, like a dad done with his toddlers' tantrums. "Look, I get that you two were scarred by Sokovia and Ultron, but I need you both for different things."

"If we're not together, neither of us will leave this craft," Wanda said.

"I'm not arguing about this."

Pietro tossed his hands up. "No security codes for you, then."

"You two aren't in charge here, and—"

"Steve, just let them go together," Stark said. "They'd be unfocused without each other anyway. And, as much as that'd mean Petey would be running into walls, it'd mean Sabrina and her crazy magic gone wacko."

Steve heaved a sigh, settling a glare on the twins. "Fine. Wanda goes with Pietro, and…"

"Nat and Clint go alone because despite not having superpowers, they can handle themselves," Nat said, crossing her arms.

Steve feigned eye contact. "Yes. Of course."

* * *

Pietro ran Wanda into the castle without a hitch, and found himself the keypad for the code. His hands already gloved, Pietro cracked his knuckles and smiled at Wanda.

"Thirty seconds," he said.

She smiled back. "Thirty-one."

Using his speed for an edge, he input every code possible, all ten thousand of them. When the door opened, he turned to Wanda.

"Thirty-one," she said, smirking. "You're getting rusty, Pietro."

Pietro shrugged. "Yeah, whatever. Cap thinks this'll take me at least a minute, which means I still have time to," he sped off, stole the closest security guard's lunch, and returned to Wanda.

"Pietro, are we in?" Captain America asked.

"Wur goof," Pietro answered through a bite of sandwich.

Steve didn't hide his huff very well. "Great. Thank you. Get back to the airship. Vision and Thor will take it from here."

Once Steve's voice disappeared, Pietro took Wanda's hand. "Hey, so I cased this place out before we started, and the prince's quarters up top aren't guarded."

Wanda raised a brow. "Really?"

"Yep."

Wanda nodded, and Pietro swept her up. The area Pietro had found wasn't redecorated into usefulness like the rest of the castle, but it was private. The spring sun shone through, warming what would otherwise been cold floor. He set Wanda down on the floor, choosing stone over the threads of a tattered rug.

"So, how did this play out?" Wanda asked.

He smiled. "You won the bet about the security codes. Your choice."

"You get the floor, then."

Pietro got down on his back on the floor and Wanda tangled herself into him, waiting until their legs were intertwined and arms around each other's waists and necks before bridging the gap between their faces. Wanda wanted to tease; he could tell just by the way she'd linger in her movements, pull her tongue back when he pushed forward, hold his wrists captive when he wanted them on her skin.

"You're gonna make me beg?" he asked as they came up for air.

"You said I won the bet," she replied before diving back in. She pulled away quick, though, planting a soft kiss on the corner of his mouth. "Savor it, Pietro."

She did her slow thing for about five kisses along his jaw and up his neck, but it drove Pietro crazy. He squirmed under her lips, and as the pleasure fired through, as he submitted to Wanda above the waist, his hands went as they pleased. He found himself skipping her breasts and the sensitive skin below her navel and went right to pulling down her pants and thumbing the seat of her underwear. She gasped, and the more she tensed under him, the faster he found himself going.

Her slow schtick stopped with that first gasp, and as she grew wet in his grasp, she freed his eager cock. She secured her position on top of him, and she slipped him in. Wanda kept the thrusts quick, her grip on his back tight, but she drove him mad regardless. He knew he shouldn't mind—it was far better than risking hurting her with him in control—but sometimes he wished she'd figure out some way to make herself unbreakable. Then, God, he could get her off faster than her nonexistent refractory period would ever allow.

He kissed her collarbone, her shoulders, her neck, whatever skin he could reach. Their hands clasped.

"I love you I love you I love you," he muttered as he felt himself climaxing.

He felt Wanda collapse around him, and with the sweet sigh of "dear brother" in his ear, he went right over the cliff.

"Oh. My. God!"

Pietro looked up, and found Clint, eyes like softballs and enough horror and shock to fuel a war in his face. Pietro barely managed to give Clint a smirk and wink while he came.

He could feel Wanda's muscles twitch in the seconds before she pulled out, but he stopped her.

"Let me…" he said.

Under the veil of his speed, he pulled out of Wanda, fixed his pants and boxers, grabbed Clint, rammed him against a wall, and was back to offer Wanda a hand.

"Pietro, I was going to just wipe his memory," Wanda said as she pulled her underwear and pants back up.

He grinned. "This way, Clint thinks he saw something, but he can never be sure."

"You're horrible."

He kissed her. "I love you."

* * *

The next time the Avengers sat down to watch Game of Thrones, the next time Jaime and Cersei had a scene together, Pietro watched as Clint's gaze slowly but surely moved to him and Wanda.

He gave the tiniest of a smile as he looked to the screen. It took Bran a while to remember Cersei and Jaime, so he let Clint stew with it.


End file.
